You cannot know what it’s like to be in love with a psychopath, sociopath or narcissist - not unless you have been there or you know someone who has.
The aftermath of life with an abuser can be very lonely, dark and indeed frightening. No-one seems to understand what you’ve been through. Those that don’t understand often victim shame, either through ignorance (that they cannot comprehend how clever or manipulative people can be) or fear (that they don’t want to believe it could ever happen to them). A lot of victims are so humiliated that they don’t speak up about it at all. They don’t express the spaghetti-like thoughts that have kept them silent and abused for so long. They lock themselves away and emotionally hide. I know because I get letters from these people every week.
I was a victim of childhood sexual abuse and for a long time I didn’t speak up because I felt judged by others and myself for having somehow been complici